Last week, California voted to allow Waymo and Cruise to operate their autonomous taxis anywhere in the city of San Francisco 24/7. Previously, they were only allowed to operate in certain neighborhoods on the northwest side of the city between the hours of 10 p.m and 5 a.m. Since the robotaxis were only allowed to operate at night, that obviously raises the question of whether or not people have been fucking in them. And the answer is obviously yes. People have absolutely been clapping cheeks in San Francisco’s robotaxis.
How do we know this? Last Friday, the San Francisco Standard published an article on the subject after speaking to four people who claim they have all gone heels-to-Jesus in a Cruise taxi over the last couple of months. Interestingly, while Cruise passengers were happy to share their experiences, the Standard was unable to find anyone who would admit to bumping uglies in a Waymo. So keep that in mind if you plan to try one out next time you’re in San Francisco.
Why Cruise taxis are apparently the go-to for passengers looking to do the horizontal polka, we have no idea, but a Waymo spokesperson told the Standard, “The vast majority of our riders are respectful and follow our rider rules.” One of those rules presumably being that you’re not supposed to grab some in-n-out during your ride.
“It seems like I’m a trailblazer,” a man identified as Alex told the Standard. “It’s also fun to realize that this is like the first place you can do this in the country — the first [autonomous vehicles] that exist.” Alex claims he has “performed at least six separate sex acts in robotaxis,” including three rides that involved “full-on [sex], no boundaries activities.”
“It was really funny because [the Cruise] got quite hot and fogged up to the point that the windshield was completely fogged over — in any other context, in any other vehicle, that would be an actual problem,” Alex told the Standard.
Even though there isn’t a driver in the front seat of these robotaxis (not that their presence in regular taxis always stops passengers from making the beast with two backs), getting your banana peeled in the back seat of a Cruise isn’t exactly anonymous. According to Cruise’s website, “We record video inside of the car for added safety and support. If something happened during your ride, we might review the recording to better understand what happened. We only record audio during active support calls.”
So not only do you run the risk of an employee catching you and banning your account, but depending on how long the recordings are stored, there’s also the risk that a hacker could leak the videos on the internet. And, of course, there are other drivers and pedestrians who will likely see you doing hot yoga in the back seat of said robotaxis. If one of those people happens to be a police officer, there’s a chance that jerkin’ it while she’s twerkin’ it may land you in some pretty hot water. But for Alex, that only adds to the appeal.
“In one instance, an individual outside of the car, in another car, looked in and basically had an understanding of what was happening—and he smiled,” Alex said. “It was not like a negative reaction; it was almost humorous. Certain people have a different threshold of concerns about public ‘situations.’”
“Was it the most comfortable? Was it the most ideal? Probably not,” a woman identified as Megan, one of Alex’s partners, told the Standard. “But the fact that we were out and about in public, the whole taboo of it being kind of wrong made it more fun and exciting.”
But despite the risk of getting banned if they’re caught, they said they’d still do it again. As Megan put it, “I was just along for the ride. Literally.”